Dahlia Birthday Flowers

Today is my birthday. Some girls from my church brought me a card and some flowers. The flowers were dying. They bought them yesterday and told me that they looked beautiful when they bought them but they "died" over night. They didn't look that bad. But I replaced them with my dahlias because NO flower can beat them :) Plus they're on their way out anyways what with all this frost and rain. So I took some pictures with the vase and the bow. I really like the vase. Perfect addition to my collection of home decor!

Dear Sam

Did you know
sometimes I wish I could leave my life and start over. Something like the witness protection program. Leave all the baggage and people I know (good and bad) and just restart.

That's what I want to do right now. Just walk away from every single thing that is even remotely connected to my life right now and just begin again. Everything. The people I love, the people I hate, the people I have crushes on and the things I enjoy and the things I hate and the sights and smells and feelings. I want my mind wiped clean, my emotional chalkboard cleanly erased, no powdery white residue left behind: FRESH. Not worry about all the things I have to make sense of. The people that I love and the people that I hate. I'd love to be more organized with my emotions and the things that I think and feel. I wish my mind was more black and white. I wish that I could control the way I feel about people. I wish that I could trust other human beings. I wish I didn't care what other people thought of me and I wish that I could love unconditionally and not over analyze every microparticle of every experience that ever happened to me.

I want to like all aspects of myself and I want others to let me know what they think. I want others to be truthful and I want to be truthful as well. I want to use the word "I" less and say more "You"s and "They"s and "We"s. I want to be stable. I want to be consistent. I want to be reliable and dependable and trustworthy and honest. I want to be someone people enjoy being around; someone to look forward to being around. I want to be happy.

Dear Jess...

Studies show that people who eat chocolate 3 times a month live almost a year longer than people who eat less (or more) of it.

This weekend my mind has been teeming with ideas, all of which I’ve shared with you. None of which I’ve been able to make the time to share with our wonderful blog. Hopefully, in a series of posts by me, I’ll be able to present those ideas without overwhelming the universe. Today, I’ll start with the events of the weekend itself for its absolutely amazing itself!

My world has been filled to the brim with homework, but somehow I’ve managed to fit that in along with the busyness of my wonderful grandparents coming up for these three days.

-Oma and Sampa (a picture from a previous vacation of ours to SeaRanch, California)-

On Friday was the first day we’d seen them in quite a long time, seeing as they live in Northern California, so the reunion and catching up was, as always, fantastic. Come Saturday we’d decided to get out of the house and venture out into the wonderful city of Seattle.

-Here I am, with my Oma, and my little step-brother, Garrett standing in front of the very popular icon of Seattle!-

There we saw:

A beautiful wedding, that has convinced my Oma that either my sister and I must have a red, black, and white themed wedding…

As well as an old time rockin' guitarist!

And a constructionist...who was about to jump!!

We stopped off to have a drink at Pike’s Places and got a seat with a view of the water that made a perfect background for a picture of the family.

After being hydrated, I had to play model for my Oma!

Along with having the time of my life, faith parked our car right next to an insanely expensive yet insanely cute boutique store; Free People. My heart nearly failed when I saw the prettiest jacket I’d ever seen; a white lacey jacket in a Victorian type style. When looking at the price tag, I sighed, and walked away. If it weren’t for my meddling Oma (which I love with all my heart) I would’ve been fine, and let it be…but she made me try it on. I am now obsessed and want it more than anything in the world, and, I would show you a picture but even their website has none! Chances are I won’t get it, though my Oma hinted about my 16th birthday, but, now I have another ‘dream on’ store to add to my lists.

This weekend was overall absolutely great! And after a weekend like this, it will only get better. 2 weeks from now I’ll be down in Portland for the wedding of my dearest cousin, Dallas, and her soon to be husband James, I cannot wait!

Love always,

Sam

Dear Sam

Did you know...

"The Two men who appeared in the wildly popular Marlboro Man advertisements died of lung cancer, earning Marlboro cigarettes the nickname “Cowboy Killer.”

I just wanted to take a quick second and tell you what thought really hit me today. I have two friends at my church who I've known for a while now and they are very good friends. Jessica Roberts and Mimi Hansen. Last year Jessica was dating a boy named Karl Johnson. Things didn't go very well and they broke up. Recently, a thing has grown between Mimi and Karl and they really like eachother. But Jessica is convinced that it's a bad idea for Mimi to date Karl and has taken it upon herself to convince Mimi too. For a week now, every time I see them it's hard feelings, words and tears.

This made me think of our Friendship Contract and the clause that talks about boys and other friends and how it's none of our business to get involved and that the contract friend is alwasy number one. I realized that, if we follow the contract, that we will never have to deal with ugly problems like the one above! And that is so nice to know and I just wanted to clarify that fact. If you are interested in a boy that I think is bad news or vice versa, then we just wait with a box of tissues. Unless an opinion is asked (which it will probably be) then it's the other persons decision and we have to respect that and just let them learn the lesson OR enjoy a good relationship. Because people can change or behave differently around different people.

So I hope that we never have to deal with stupid boy fights. They really are so petty... Well, that's all I wanted to tell you. Hope your day in Seattle yesterday was fabulous! :) Post your pictures soon! :)

Love,

Jess

Dear Sam

Did you know...

"Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better."

So I'm posting again because I had a really good day today and because I wanted to share with you my Dhalias!

Here are the gorgeous flowers

There are red ones too, I just need to wait for a sunny day to take more pictures. While I was in Utah my mom was telling me about how I probably missed them and wouldn't get to see any blooms and I was kind of sad about that. And then I got home and they exploded with beautiful brilliance and I just shook my head. Now I know to take what she says with a grain of salt.

I enjoyed eating with you today. And I apologize for rubbing the fact that you denied my offer in your face. That wasn't very civilized. However, I do wish with a good portion of my heart that you had made the decision to come up because it has revolutionized my life and I have so many more opportunities to learn and participate in things and make friends that I otherwise wouldn't have ever gotten to meet.

There is a downside of course. The fact that I don't get to drive until senior year, the fact that I will probably not go to homecoming or prom for real, the fact that people always ask "What?! How does that work?" and always moving up in things like girls camp and Aspen grove things because I want to be with the people that are at my maturity level.

But, nevertheless, I am still grateful for the wonderful people that have come into my life because of this choice and I really wish you had said yes, but I know that it's not all over and that even though Lee and his brother and the school district are being douches, you can't let that get to you. You are just as intelligent, if not more, than they are. You have so much more passion for learning and the specific subjects and, you have social skills. So even though you are at the wrong end of a gross injustice, take comfort in the fact that you know they are wrong.

Anyways. I told you why I had a good day, so I don't think I need to rehash it except to say that it makes me feel peacfully happy inside instead of giddy happy. And I like the peace more because it is more stable and lasts longer. I just hope that we can be friends.

Hope you have a good night. Text or call me or something because I knew that we had talked about that at some point...
Love,

Jess

Dear Sam

Did you know....

"Because sharks very rarely get cancer, scientists study their cartilage in the hopes of finding a cure for the disease. "

Holy smokes girl! I just had the best day of my life... but sadly since this thing is public I'm not sure if I feel comfortable talking about all of it and using names. So can we please make it private? I'm going to to it anyways and tell you all about what happened and then we can talk more about it later

Anyways: I got to third period today and there he was sitting over on the other side of the room facing the door and I tried to say Hi to him but I couldn't! :) So I sat in third period feeling lame and chicken.

Fourth period went by (And I'll tell you more about that later :/) and I ate lunch with you. Crunching on carrots in an otherwise quiet room... :) and I was on my way to fifth period, hoping that he would be at the end of the hall by the theatre, when all of the sudden I heard "Hey Jessica M." and I was totally caught off guard and could not keep my thoughts straight. That is not normal for me but we had an acceptable conversation nonetheless. We walked all the way from the commons to the theatre and I was so happy.

Fifth period passed pretty uneventful. He had to leave half way through the class (Which he isn't really in) and left James to help Lloyd with the music. Sixth period passed boring, but quickly, and it was the end of the day. The bell had just rung and I thought I should stay here longer and I'm not sure why but I did. I was talking to James about the Domestic Violence skits and from the front parking lot stage door in he came. He gave James an over dramatic hug (to which James played wonderfully along with) and then he looked down at me (Because he was on the stage and I wasn't) and smiled soo wonderfully and said "Hello Jessica Maloy" and I looked up at him and smiled so contentedly and said "Hello David" and it was so wonderful. And as speedily as he came, he was gone. Neither of us (Jessica or James) knew why he came in. But he did and I was glad for that. Both the walk to 5th and the post 6th encounters more than made up for the poor showing in 3rd.

And that is why my day was so unbelievably wonderful.

I friend requested him on facebook and he accepted and immediatly liked my status and commented on my wall. Samantha, you don't even know how cute he is! AHHH!

NEW TOPIC

The reason that APLAC today was so odd and dissappointing is because we analyzed a poem from the 20th century that was said to be the best of it's time period. It goes like this:

so much depends
upon
a red wheel
barrow
glazed with rain
water
beside the white
chickens.

And nobody understood why it was so amazing. I still don't know either. Granted, it does paint a beautiful picture in my mind and the words are simple. But When Newton talks about how every word was carefully chosen and placed and everything has deeper meaning.... I just lose interest.

I don't believe that when William Carlos Williams wrote this he used red because it symbolized blood and white for purity and the rain was for ... whatever. I have reached this conclusion:

Writers hype up alot of what they do to make it seem deeper and have more meaning than it really does. It helps distinguish them and makes them feel more sophisticated and cultured when in reality they are just simple and pretty words on a page; no further.

Same goes with Chefs. Thinking that caviar is to die for and that spending thousands of dollars on exotic and rare mushrooms (truffles) and all that hype. I just don't buy it. Yes, it tastes good but it's not that earth shattering.

Anyways. I had a great day. Thanks for letting me eat lunch with you again!

Love,

Jess

Dear Jess

I’ve finally found the one thing that doesn’t go with black; tomato soup.

Sadly, I had to find this out the hard way by spilling nearly an entire bowl of close to boiling tomato soup all over myself and my couch.

Have you ever noticed when you’re sick, everything seems a whole lot worse and a completely miserable? That was my day today. But enough about being sick and horribly horrible days; after a good half an hour of open windows and Ingrid Michaelson my current situation will more likely than not improve!

School work has been exploding into my life and making it nearly impossible to do anything else with my time. From AP Bio to Pre Calc/Trig, I fear that I will go insane. It’s prevented me from making any more progress on my soon to be ‘own room,’ a project I had just launched towards the end of the summer that is so close I can taste it!

I had planned projects within this ultimate project like a ‘colormekatie’ style silhouette frames, and my fantastic interior designer mother’s idea of framing a rather large textile in three pieces above my bed, as well as finishing up the painting of the walls.

(Katie Soloker of colormekatie.blogspot.com. Click the pic to go to her post!)

In the meantime, as I said before school work has become the number one occupant of my time, but not all of it is bad. Starting Friday my first Studio Photography project begins. Photography has always captured my interest (no pun intended!) and over this weekend my assignment is to take photos of landscape and flora and already I have places in mind to go!

(not mine-click the pic and follow the link!)

I can’t wait to get the film from my teacher, and to sum it up, it’s a film camera (hence the film from the teacher) and is purely black and white. Out of the numerous photos I will take 4 will be developed and hopefully I’ll find a way to but them on the blog within the next month!

(now, this one's mine!)

Until then, work work work work work….

Love,
Sam

P.S.
Check out the About Us- I’ve put up a picture of our wonderful journal!